Friday, 12 May 2023

Straight Expectations by Calum McSwiggan - Blog Tour

 


'Seventeen-year-old Max has always been out, proud and just a little spoiled. Frustrated by the lack of romantic options in his small-town high school, during an argument with his lifelong best friend Dean, Max lashes out and says he wishes he had never been born gay.

'Max gets more than he bargained for when he wakes up to find his wish has come true - not only have his feelings for boys vanished, but so has Dean.

'With his school life turned upside down and his relationship with his family in tatters, Max sets out on a journey of rediscovery to find a way back to the life he took for granted, and the romance he thought he'd never have.'

I think that there will be quite a few queer people who read Straight Expectations who've had a similar thought to the book's lead character, that they wish they could lead an easy, regular, heterosexual life. I think that having that thought is fairly normal for anyone in a marginalised group, the desire to have it easier, to not be targeted because of your identity. I also think that it's a thought that is probably going to be shared more with older queer readers, those who grew up during Section 28 when even the very whispers of someone being gay in school was the potential to destroy your life. Whilst things are very far from perfect now, with more and more homophobic and transphobic bills and legislation being passed, the general perception and acceptance of queer people has improved a lot; especially amongst younger generations. As such, the central conflict of this book, of wishing away your homosexuality, will probably feel more shocking to the books intended younger readers.

Straight Expectations tells the story of Max, a young 17-year-old gay boy living in a small English village. Max came out at age twelve, and his best friend, Dean, has always stood beside him; largely because Dean is the only other gay person Max has known most of his life. The two of them are also friends with Alicia, a queer ally who supports the two boys at school and in their personal lives. Max seemingly has a pretty decent life, his parents are divorced, but they're happier for it and he has good relationships with them. Dean is the big star in the school drama department, and Alicia is their top artist, and Max loves helping them out and spending time with them. They're running a school LGBTQ+ club that's helping other students. Compared to a lot of young queer people Max has it good.

However, there's something that's been gnawing at Max for a long while now. He's single. There are pretty much no options for his dating circle in their small community, and whilst there is another gay boy in their school other than him and Dean, Oliver Cheng, and Max does have a massive crush on him, he's yet to work up the nerve to even talk to him. When Dean and Alicia try to engineer a meet-cute for the two of them it fails to result in a date; so they push Max into sending Oliver a message instead. But when Max is left on read and doesn't get a response his feelings finally bubble over. He snaps at his friends, he doesn't listen to them when they tell him how good his life is, he disregards their point that their lives aren't easy and great due to having to deal with racism (something Max never has to worry about). He refuses to focus on anything but his lack of a love life. 

It's then that Max makes a wish, a wish that he could have a 'normal' life, an easy life. He wishes that he could be straight instead, so that he can date and have fun. And worse of all, he wishes he and Dean had never become friends. The next day Max wakes up and finds his whole world has changed. The posters of boys on his bedroom walls have been replaced by bikini babes, the clothing in his wardrobe is different, and his parents are married. Heading to school, Max finds that his friend circle is different, that he's friends with Oliver, and that he's dating Alicia. Even weirder, the guys do nothing for him, and he's noticing every pretty girl around him. It's then that he realises what he's done, that he's changed the world around him. Thinking that making friends with Dean again will be the way to set things right he sets out to do so; but when no one knows who Dean is Max has to face the idea that he might be stuck in this new, twisted version of his life.



I have to be honest, when I first heard of the idea of Straight Expectations I wasn't sure what to think. In a world that's still incredibly hostile to queer people, where conversion therapy still happens, and people are 'cured' of their homophobia, here's a book where the lead character is able to wish away their gayness. I was worried that this book could be sending the wrong message, or that it could be promoting something less than ideal. However, my fears couldn't have been more misplaced. Yes, the book has a magical circumstance that turns a gay boy straight and changes the world around him, but it's not making that out to be a good thing. If anything, Straight Expectations is a celebration of queer identity, and of being yourself. 

One of the things that the book does that I appreciated, is that it very quickly establishes that the new reality Max finds himself in isn't better. There are parts of it that initially seem good to him, Oliver is his friend, his parents are still together, but the vast majority of things are a less enjoyable, less hopeful version of his life. Alicia's father isn't a fun loving guy who treats him like a son, but an angry father who dislikes him. His parents might still be together, but their arguing, their relationship is on the rocks, and none of them are happy. He even notices that there are less openly queer kids at school, that without the presence of Dean and the LGBTQ+ club some students haven't found the community and the support to come out. One of the saddest moments in this new reality is when he comes across one of his friends from his normal life, a trans girl who was in a loving relationship with another girl; but in this new world she hasn't come out, she's still living under her dead name, and he can see how much she's suffering because of it.

A central message of the book is that a world without the queer community is one that's lesser. Yes, there's still Oliver, who's now the only openly queer kid in school, but all of the others are gone. People feel like they can't be themselves, they don't have a community, homophobia is a little more open, and people just seem to lack the spark that made them happier in the other world. A lot of this seems to be down to the lack of Dean, a person so happy and confident in their identity that they refuse to back down or hide who they are. Dean pushed people around him to be better, to do better, and without that things are just worse. Yes, this could just be a story about how one person being missing from your life can put you on a completely different path that isn't as good, but it can also be a commentary on how if we continue to allow the erasure of the queer community we're going to make the world a much worse place.

Max's journey through this alternate world is the main focus of the book, but it's not the only thing that Straight Expectations does. Max does end up figuring out a way to go home, though he doesn't realise it. Most stories would end soon after this, they'd show the lead getting back to their own life, repairing their bridges, and moving forward in some nebulous way. But in Straight Expectations there's still a good twenty percent of the book left. We actually get to see Max taking the lessons he learned in that other timeline and applying them to his life. He makes up with his friends, he finds a new path in his own life, and he finally plucks up the courage to talk to Oliver now that he's experienced being friends with him without the nervous tension of having a crush on him. We actually get to see how this experience makes him a better person over a number of days, if not weeks, and it makes the book feel a bit more special.

Straight Expectations is billed as being a queer romance, and whilst it's definitely that it's also something a bit more special. It's a book about identity. Max's story is about learning to accept who he is, to see that the things that are issues for him aren't really that big; especially compared to some of the things that others are going through. The book asks the readers to take a think about what one simple change might actually do in the long run, how one tiny thing can have huge ripple effects, and why perhaps changing those tiny things isn't worth obsessing over.Be happy with the life you have, do what you can to change things going forward, and try to embrace the good you already have.

I had a lot more fun with Straight Expectations than I was expecting, and it ended up being a book that I struggled to put down, finishing it in just two sessions. This isn't a genre that I normally go for, and the initial description made me unsure about it, but it ended up being a hugely enjoyable experience, and one that I'm so glad I took a chance on.




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